Countering Personality Conflicts in Election Season

When one is running for re-election to a Board, what is the best way to campaign to the overwhelmingly apathetic owners when your opponent is waging a non-intellectual, personality driven campaign that is typical of neighborhood "cattiness" or gossip? Most people naturally don't care/don't want to get involved and like a community that's run like a smoothly oiled machine. How do you verbally communicate to such owners (some you may have never communicated with) when your opponent likely has already contacted such owners and waged a personality/catty campaign against you?

What Tim said!

It's true some people are and will remain apathetic, regardless of what you say - and that will also include your opponent. Others only respond to gossip, which may also be a weird form of apathy. You may not get everyone behind you and depending on the community's size, you won't have to. Continue to tell people who you are, your background and what you can bring to the association as a board member. The rest will take care of itself.

You may or may not lose, but if you do lose, that shouldn't stop you from caring or from speaking up and helping when you can. You'll be surprised at how many people are paying attention, although they don't say anything. Good luck!

-- And never describe the differences you have with someone else as a "personality conflict." It shows a lack of conviction in your beliefs.

My opponent though has an overly friendly/nice personality and a keen ability to connect with people on a small talk basis. I can engage in small talk, but am unable to laugh and giggle about trite things while simultaneously demeaning my neighbor's personality.

Completely disagree.

One always brings up their own insecurities when describing others. What you think of me is not what I think of me..it is what you think of yourself.

Good advice.

Maybe things are different in AZ, but . . .

In my experience, the Board runs the show and the MC (as a paid service provider) follows the direction/decisions of the Board. The MC will permit whatever the Board tells them to permit. Unless there's some minutiae built into your MC contract that details what they will and will not do in regard to elections . . . if the Board as a whole decides that they want to allow full page statements, then that's the direction provided to the MC, and the MC should make it happen.

NpB, you're presently on the Board, right? (I can't keep track). Get your Board to agree and direct the MC to allow your one-page statement.

That said, if you are using all the white space on one page, then regardless of how great your accomplishments, nobody is going to read it. Suggest keeping things simple, straight forward, factual, bulletized perhaps, to the point. Focus on important accomplishments, money saved, significant activities, etc. If you think people will be craving more in-depth info on what you've done, make even more info accessible . . . create a personal webpage, have more details ready to email/mail (provide your email address for people to contact you), or something else if you still want to try and get more info out there.

Also, if you have concerns about this other person's interactions with homeowners giving them a leg up on you . . . I wouldn't rely solely on your one-page statement to be sufficient campaigning for you. You'll need to get out and do the same thing . . . go talk to people, knock on doors, hand-deliver your statement, and anything else to make sure people know who you are and what you've done.

Same here. We beg people to get on the BOD. Have not had an election for over 4 years do to more open spots then people wanting them.

Typically in an election, the more votes one gets, the more likely they are to be elected.
I believe the thinking here is . . .
If the apathetic vote for the opponent, then that's more votes the opponent will get, increasing the likelihood of the opponent being elected.
However, if the apathetic vote for NpB, then that's more votes NpB will get, increasing the likelihood of NpB being elected.
Math is tough, but seems to make sense to me.
Whether the apathetic care or not about who they are electing does not factor in. The apathetic still get a vote and the candidate who secures more of those votes stands a better chance of being elected.

What do you all think of the idea of mailing out secular holiday greeting cards to some apathetic owners signed "Your name of HOA neighbor"?

This would be separate from but in advance of ballots being mailed out to owners. Would not mention in holiday card that I am running for Board or that I am on Board.

Understood. How about sending a holiday card to owners who occasionally attend meetings? Or is that looked upon negatively?

Mail out a single page, large type, bullet points as to why people should vote for you. The card idea is hookey.

"hookey," JohnC? Is that a SC word? : )

I think NpB wrote about perhaps sending a holiday card before sending a election blurb, which s/he'd do later.

I still thinking that NPB is looking at these apathetic owners as key to having them win the election. It doesn't sound like those whom are not apathetic are necessarily supporters of the idea.

When it comes to apathetic owners it is always "be careful what you wish for... you may just get it". Apathetic doesn't equal pathetic. You may be extremely surprised by the reaction you will get from those you view as "apathetic". Having had that eye opening experience myself. They don't necessarily want involved with the HOA period and will tell you about it. What you going to do about it? That is where you get the votes from. Actions not words.

What positive or negative experience did you have with apathetic owners?

The overwhelming number of members in my HOA are apathetic owners. About 10% of owners are seriously interested and they attend Board meetings and often run for the Board. Another 5% are agitators who are disgruntled over a Board decision or who simply don't like the personality/lifestyle/personal preferences of certain Board members and instead of expressing ideological differences, they express themselves via gossip. Some people are very effective at convincing others not to like a person based on gossip and non-ideological factors. I'm sure most of you will agree that a community inundated with pervasive gossip will likely not be harmonious and not as effective in solving problems. Some have opined the Board hiring a mediator or organizational psychologist would be a waste of time because personality conflicts are almost impossible to overcome.

I have written a candidate statement that centers around ideology/goals and addresses moving past personality conflicts and gossip. My goal is to reframe the dialogue from gossip to one focused on issues. I anticipate my opponent(s) will most likely have a candidate statement devoid of ideology and instead about their career or generic corporate speak statements, since that's been the trend for many years. Don't know why owner are so hesitant to express ideology.

Assuming my opponents engage in an email or in person gossip campaign of which I would have no idea what is being oralized or written, how do you recommend I "campaign"?

Regarding your second question, I would think the management company wouldn't care who turned in the ballot - unless there's talk of doing away with them, they're going to get paid regardless of who's on the board, so why should they care?

You say the bulk of your neighbors are apathetic on HOA issues, and unfortunately, there is no magic bullet to make them sit up and pay attention. Some don't even blink when you talk of assessment increases or even special assessments, so as others have suggested, stop wringing your hands over this. Go ahead and distribute your candidate statement to EVERYONE and see what happens.

For now, assume the others will take the high road and concentrate on the issues instead of gossip and personalities. Distribute your candidate statement to EVERYONE and see what happens. if the 10% like what they see and the 5% are inclined to give you a chance, that may be all you need. Especially since most the homeowners might not vote anyway. I wouldn't worry about the gossip campaign (unless there's something you aren't telling us.)

After 10 years on my board, I learned HOA board work ain't for sissies and you need to decide RIGHT NOW if you have the backbone for campaigning and actually serving once you get on the board. It's ok to be afraid, but if you really want this, you'll find a way to work through it. You'll need it to deal with the 5% who may then have a notion to intimidate or manipulate you, and that's not good for any board member. Simply tell your truth and leave it at that. You can only control what you think, say and do - everyone else is going to do them, so you may as well do you too.

(Besides, you see what focusing on personality did to this country for the last 4 years - we can only hope that's over now!)

I brought up the topic of gossip and deep personality conflicts because it is unhealthy to have a neighborhood engrossed in it. I want to persuade owners to focus on issues and ideology. I believe that candidates who reveal nothing about ideology are suspicious and might be influenced by gossip.

I do have the backbone for Board service. In a previous election when I was not on the ballot, I encouraged some owners to vote for certain candidates, but a lot never followed through to turn in a ballot. Now that I am on the ballot, once my candidate statement gets sent out (along with other potential candidates) by the management company, I plan to contact owners to encourage them to vote for me. I haven't figured out yet how to persuade owners to return a ballot.

If goal is to get people to return a ballot . . . I suggest (and I know some of this is beyond your control):
- Make voting electronic if possible. (You can do much more complex and legally-involved/binding things electronically. Why can you not vote for your HOA Board electronically? Subject to state and local HOA law and your documents obviously.)
- Make ballots and proxies simple, straightforward, easily understandable. Any additional instruction needs to be brief/simple.
- Include a pre-addressed, stamped envelope for returning ballot.
- If no stamped envelope for return, offer a secure dropbox location in neighborhood for return of ballots.
- If you can conceive a way for people to hand you their ballot and you safely/securely get it where it needs to go, then do that.
- While people should be naturally incentivized to participate in their HOA Board election, perhaps there is another form of incentive that could be figured out.
- Maybe send ballots a second time to those who did not return the initial ballot.

If goal is to get people to vote for you . . . I suggest:
- Make it convincing as to why they should vote for you . . . ideology is great, but actions speak louder than words. What actions have you done or will you do for the HOA? Why are you the right person for your Board?
- Also (and I mean this as constructive criticism), you seem like someone who will analyze something to the fullest extent (likely even things that don't necessitate or require such extensive analysis). While careful and appropriate decision-making is vitally important as a Board Member, such an approach could also be a significant hindrance to you, the rest of your Board, and your HOA as a whole. You may be prone to analysis paralysis . . . overwhelming yourself with data, info, what-ifs, and unlikely hypothetical tangents such that arriving at a decision is a lengthy, excruciating process for all involved. You think it's a smart and necessary step. Others think you're impossible to work with and a PITA. Decisions need to be made appropriately and in a timely manner, and stuff needs to get done.
- Make personal connections with your neighbors. They need to know who you are and why you want to be on the Board. There are many ways . . . send an email, create a website or online profile, host a virtual discussion session, walk around and introduce yourself, put out your own flyer . . . and repeat as many times as necessary (but don't turn people off by being too much).
- Stop spending so much time trying to counter the actions/words of this other person you keep referencing. If they have such widespread influence in the HOA, then you're probably fighting a losing battle until they prove themselves to be a disaster (probably unlikely also). Just ignore this other individual and run your own campaign . . . back to my first point about making yourself the convincing choice for the Board.
- I don't think that you know or have actually communicated with this large group of "apathetic homeowners", so I think your inappropriately putting them all in a negative light. There are varied reasons for their actual or apparent lack of interest or involvement. If you want to be on the Board, it's your job to get (enough of) them interested so they become your advocates/votes.

As ND said and I agree with:

Make it convincing as to why they should vote for you . . . ideology is great, but actions speak louder than words. What actions have you done or will you do for the HOA? Why are you the right person for your Board?

Also (and I mean this as constructive criticism), you seem like someone who will analyze something to the fullest extent (likely even things that don't necessitate or require such extensive analysis). While careful and appropriate decision-making is vitally important as a Board Member, such an approach could also be a significant hindrance to you, the rest of your Board, and your HOA as a whole. You may be prone to analysis paralysis . . . overwhelming yourself with data, info, what-ifs, and unlikely hypothetical tangents such that arriving at a decision is a lengthy, excruciating process for all involved. You think it's a smart and necessary step. Others think you're impossible to work with and a PITA. Decisions need to be made appropriately and in a timely manner, and stuff needs to get done.

Use humor and short sentences in your campaign letter or any other literature.

I am picking up on an “ over thinking” of how to explain to people that you are the best candidate. Identify a group who will vote for you and make sure they get the ballot returned.

Samuel Clemons said it best "Better people think you are stupid than open up your mouth and prove it". You can't disprove what people assume about you other than proving it's not to be assumed.

The first lie is the best lie...

Believe me, been there, done that, and got the T-shirt... It doesn't matter what you say. Unless you PROVE it is a lie or wrong, your just going to have to live that lie in someone else's eyes.

Our ex-president was a scumbag. He'd been ripping off the HOA for years. Tried so many "tricks" to get HOA money when I was in charge it was non-stop. Stopped him as much as possible. However, because he had president for so long and people believed him, it didn't matter how much I told the truth about him.

So guess what? I didn't have to live my life in those people's eyes or lies. I lived my own truth. Sooner or later those people would see through what he said by what he did. Eventually those people learned. Until that happened, I had to do me and not what others said about me.