Guidance: being abused by my own Board Member

I am coming here to ask for some direction on the issue that I am having with my condo association. It keeps me up late and stresses me out so badly that my neck hurts and I cannot sleep, and I have had two migraines this week.

Last Monday, I got a call from the Board President asking me to move my car because it was near where cement work was being done at our property. I explained that I wasn't home and could not move my car at that moment, but would get there as quickly as I could. He told me that they were towing my car. I could not believe that they would tow a car with no prior notice when it was legally parked in my parking lot. As I explained to my Board Member that no information was provided about what the cement project consisted of or what would be done, and no mention of anything affecting our parking had been provided, he called me an "idiot" and made sexist remarks that "maybe only guys know about cement repair". I started explaining that had I known the scope I may have understood, where he promptly called me an "idiot" once more and I disconnected the call. I contacted the police and had them meet me at the property, where one single board member and the (terrible) property manager were loitering. They did not tow my car, but they did call the tow truck to come, so now ALL of the owners are paying for their harassment of me. I left the property and went to get hurricane supplies. I received a text from this same board member accusing me of being in my unit, and was appalled at the accusation. I just bought a car less than 3 weeks ago and would not have wanted anything to damage it. Whoever "tattled" didn't see that I was waiting on the police before I went downstairs. When I came back from running errands, the front door to the building had been boarded up. I could not take my supplies up the fire escape four floors.

The next day, four men were in my parking lot, one the same board member from the day before. He was rude, dismissive, and told me that he didn't care about my property. He called me an idiot, got about 2" from my face, he called me crazy, and he stepped back and then said "I hope you keel over and die".Two Board Members heard him, one I had a lengthy conversation with after where he said that he was way, way out of line. The other said "oh, well, everyone says something they don't mean".

That same night, I received an email from my property manager scolding me for speaking to a contractor, the same ones that needed me to bandage and tend to his wound when he smashed it on our property. She told me that I would be fined for using the door, and made some other financial threats against me. Guess next time, I'll let them keep a rubber band wrapped as tight as possible around two fingers, and he can lose them. Come ON!

I do not know what to do because the board member is a bully. I am so afraid and have even started carrying a gun in my purse. I will not speak to him again, and will only turn away if I see him. It is wrecking my home life, peace, and I am afraid to even pull in my driveway. I live in fear. I need help, for real. Can you tell I am at wits end?

Thanks so much!

Jennifer,

Sorry to hear of your troubles.

Obviously, one option is to sell and move. However, we know that this is easier said then done and simply may not be practical.

You are doing the right thing by contacting the police when you feel threatened.
Do not do anything that will cause yourself more problems.

If you need the weapon to feel safe, fine.
Make sure you have a license for a conceal/carry permit. If you don't have one, don't carry it concealed (in your purse).
Don't show the weapon and don't pull the weapon unless you have to. Once you do, the issue has escalated and the police will be knocking on your door asking you questions.

Hopefully the hurricane didn't affect your area to badly and things will get back to normal fairly quickly.
Hopefully, what ever work is being done near your area will be finished soon and life can go on.

Again, call the police when you feel threatened.

Tim

It is called calling the police. Being a board member doesn't protect you from being arrested for breaking the law. Too bad... Too sad... You practice being mean to people you have to answer to the law... NOT the HOA one...

Oh yeah ... and, LOSE the gun. My sense is that you sound a bit too emotional to be carrying lethal weapons. Remember, you are just dealing with a bully president.

Because Jennifer wrote as her subject, "being abused by my own Board member," it seems like she's on the board, But I don't think she is.

This doesn't make the behavior towards her acceptable. I think George's approach makes sense and she should write a chronological list of each incident since she may have to resort to legal action. eave out the details like running errands, etc.

DO call the police if anyone threatens you with physical harm. Again I agree with George: LOSE the gun.

WHY ?!

Well the bright side is that the storm is over, flood waters should be receding and things will slowly get back to normal.

Were you under the MANDATORY evacuation order BEFORE the building was 'boarded up' ?

When is the court date for the PERMANENT injunction (order of protection) ?

'Temps' are routinely granted pending appearance in court !

Your living arrangement, by YOUR telling, are awful.

? Why do you stay ?

That is my question too... Was there NOT a mandatory evacuation put into place? Seems a bit strange... Guess I am finding the whole "I am a victim" thing a little conflicting. If a place was boarded up to prevent damage and make sure people did not enter, then I am to feel bad you carried water up flights of stairs? Seems to me you didn't want to evacuate. Of course there is NO mail!!! It's an EMERGENCY situation!!! There is NO mail delivery during these times despite that whole crap of "Rain, sleet etc...". That's just NOT true. We got hit by F5 tornadoes. No electricity for a week. No mail was delivered. There was no gas stations working!

Sorry, I was so tired last night, I didn't do a very good job explaining. We were under a state of emergency, but not an evacuation order. We knew it was coming here, likely flooding and power loss. I was staying here unless something changed with the storm, and so wanted to ensure I had some bottled water and groceries, supplies, batteries, etc. The door was boarded up by the contractors working on the cement sidewalk outside the front door, likely to prevent rocks from hitting it.

They could have taken the plywood and made a little ramp over the rocks, just like they said they were going to do. But they left it boarded up, and I was seriously concerned about my ability to get my items upstairs by myself, but far more concerned about not being able to get out if there was an emergency.

The Temp order was not granted because I have not done anything to her. I don't know how this whole things works, and am waiting for a call from the attorney this morning.

I don't know how to get the pics to attach!!

Thanks for the support and beating me up when i am already feeling at the bottom. They served the papers, she applied for a temporary restraining order and it was denied, and they set a hearing for it. That is all I know.

They boarded up the door against fire code, trapping me in the building. It was against the law. They were not boarding it up for the hurricane. They didn't even do any prep for that.

Hope you don't ever need some guidance and I'm fed up with this beat down. Have a great day.

Yet the Jabberwocky continues

OVER AND OUT

PaaN you serious? It is not your job to decide if she is telling the truth or not.. she is asking for help, if you cant give any then go back where you came from.