Process for requesting mediation

Generally, a third party mediator, with no connection to either side in a dispute, would hear both sides and help negotiate a settlement. It's similar to arbitration, but the primary difference is that in arbitration, the arbitrator would actually render a decision that both sides agreed in advance to comply with. Like a mediator, an arbitrator cannot have any connection to either side.

The idea of mediation is to help settle disputes without duking it out in court - ideally it's less expensive, faster than running to court and you usually don't need an attorney (unless the dispute is really complicated). If you mediate, you may also want to ask what happens if a settlement is reached, but someone balks - the other side may be able to take the thing to court and the proceedings from the mediation could be used as evidence (that won't look good for the other side that originally agreed to the settlement terms and then reneged).

Ask your board for more information on how you can take your issue to mediation. While you're at it, take a good look at your arguments vs. the arguments of your board. Sometimes, you take a look at the issue and come up with a solution no one thought of,and if the board goes along with the compromise, you save time and money. Better yet, have a friend take a look at the situation - it can be helpful to look at the matter through a different set of eyes and perspectives. Good luck!

Curious what the request is and the reason for denial. Do they quote and state the rule of the reason why? Sometimes they may be protecting ourselves from ourselves... Believe me, there have been times where I wanted something but listening to the other side helped avoid a mistake/issue.

Keep in mind, unless you plan on keeping your house forever...Changes can be considered "Personal" preference. The HOA has to consider future sale and attractiveness of homes to potential buyers. Your change makes a difference it can effect the overall view of the homes. Plus you never improve your home beyond your neighbors. So just be careful of what your asking for. It may not be worth the battle.

Keep in mind that the Boards hands may be tied if what you are asking for violates any section of the CC&Rs.
Typically, the Board has zero authority to waive sections of the CC&Rs, only the membership can do that and that typically takes 2/3 of the membership to approve.

ChuckR3 Wash. Good comments above.

1-Lacking a mechanism you say you are unable to find within your governing documents, you may be able instead to get some start-up insights from a lawyer, paralegal or even a community mediation service (not for profit).

2 -Washington state incidentally seems to have a Uniform Mediation Act Chapter 7.07 RCW
http://apps.leg.wa.gov/rcw/default.aspx?cite=7.07 . . . with a definition of it but a scope that defaults to "(a) The mediation parties are required to mediate by statute or court or administrative agency rule or referred to mediation by a court, administrative agency, or arbitrator. At this stage that isn't yopur scenario.

3 - Pragmatically why not look into triggering the informal process - with a qualified professional - by a written invitation to activate the provision of your governing document with specific reference to the section etc.

Suggest that both you and the association each bring forth a list of qualified mediators with either some commonalty or a willingness to accept. It's not rocket science, hopefully gets privilege without disclosure and may be not too expensive. There are usually no Mediation Police, so maybe only the mediator will respect privileged disclosures or offers.

3 - ( My own jurisdiction in 1998 legislated it as a hurdle to try to keep condo governance document disputes out of civil court, but botched the wording almost beyond comprehension. Most condo disputants here anyway seem to prefer letting toxicity fester or finding out the hard way just how expensive it is to formally litigate . . .) ,