The ABSOLUTE FUNNIEST line EVER spoken at an annual meeting. Ever! EVER!!!

Started by GnomeX • 27 replies • 2241 views

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GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

So we had our annual meeting today. Meeting called to order. Parliamentarian reads the rules and informs the members it will be governed by Robert's Rules of Order. Parliamentarian then opens the floor to the members to debate the rules.

And then... it starts...

Near direct quote from the very FIRST member given the floor.

"Who the hell is this Robert guy? Why are we following his rules? Just who does he think he is to dictate how we run OUR meeting? He won't even disclose his last name!"

My wife lost it and just started laughing...

MelissaP1 (Alabama)
Posts: 13,836

Posted:

The last name is "Redford" and heard he's a "Natural"... LOL!!!

Former HOA President

KevinK7 (Florida)
Posts: 1,343

Posted:

What was the response?

TimB4 (Tennessee)
Posts: 21,059

Posted:

I thought you were going to say that the funniest line was "are there any volunteers?"

JohnB26 (South Carolina)
Posts: 1,569

Posted:

must be the HOA is operating under the HOPA act

j/i/c: Housing for Older Persons Act ~ i kid you not

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Here is another gem of utter stupidity...

Our Clubhouse is valued at around $250,000 - 300,000 even in its poor condition. The roof is leaking and needs to be completely re-shingled at a cost of around $30,000.

Clubhouse roof repairs were debated. One member piped up we should just "blow up the Clubhouse" to which he received a standing ovation from nearly everyone in the room. I'm NOT joking. Other more moderate views were to pay someone to demolish the Clubhouse.

So instead of working to sell an asset or leasing it to generate revenue, these people want to literally destroy an asset valued at 1/4 to 1/3 of a million dollars. All to get out of paying $30,000 to repair the roof!!!

I caught flak from some posters here when I stated I lived in a community plagued by uneducated morons. I wasn't exaggerating in the least.

Yeah... And who the hell is this Robert guy?!

I think I found my tagline...

BethJ2 (California)
Posts: 62

Posted:

When I took over as President a couple of years ago our previous President of many, many years asked "What is this Open Meeting Act you keep talking about?". More pathetic, than funny.

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By KevinK7 on 11/11/2013 12:06 AM
What was the response?

Response?

Parliamentarian then disclosed this Robert guy's first name was not Robert. Robert was his last name. Then she went on to inform the body of members that this guy's rules have been around for over 200 years and are now used by most of the governing bodies in the nation. Oh and that one of the intentions of this guy Robert was to protect the rights of a minority party against the will of a majority.

They didn't seem to like hearing that especially the part about protecting a minority from the will of a majority. Probably because the majority of the people in the room were ignorant nitwits intent on running roughshod over the clear minority of educated & rational people at the meeting.

BruceF1 (Connecticut)
Posts: 2,535

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By GnomeX on 11/11/2013 12:20 PM
this guy's rules have been around for over 200 years and are now used by most of the governing bodies in the nation.

Perhaps that's true for municipal governments but it's not true for Congress and most states.

Only about 5 state legislative bodies out of 99 actually use Robert's. (Nebraska is unicameral). Most state legislative bodies (about 70) use Mason's Manual of Legislative Procedure. Congress has their own Parliamentary rules.

Also, Robert's Rules has been around for less than 200 years, although parliamentary law in some form or another has been. According to the Official Robert's Rules website, Henry Martyn Robert was an engineering officer in the regular Army and the first edition of Robert's Rules was published in February, 1876. Robert's Rules has only been in print for 137 years - still a long time, though.

BanksS
Posts: 403

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By BruceF1 on 11/11/2013 1:34 PM

Posted By GnomeX on 11/11/2013 12:20 PM
this guy's rules have been around for over 200 years and are now used by most of the governing bodies in the nation.

Thanks for educating us on different forms of parliamentary procedures.

And to Gnome. Haven't you ever been to meetings where the most moronic people in the room were the most educated. Educated people don't have a monopoly on common sense. I've worked with plenty of educated people who are clueless.

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By BanksS on 11/11/2013 3:17 PM

And to Gnome. Haven't you ever been to meetings where the most moronic people in the room were the most educated. Educated people don't have a monopoly on common sense. I've worked with plenty of educated people who are clueless.

No I've never been to Congress...

KevinK7 (Florida)
Posts: 1,343

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By GnomeX on 11/11/2013 9:20 AM
Here is another gem of utter stupidity...

Our Clubhouse is valued at around $250,000 - 300,000 even in its poor condition. The roof is leaking and needs to be completely re-shingled at a cost of around $30,000.

Clubhouse roof repairs were debated. One member piped up we should just "blow up the Clubhouse" to which he received a standing ovation from nearly everyone in the room. I'm NOT joking. Other more moderate views were to pay someone to demolish the Clubhouse.

So instead of working to sell an asset or leasing it to generate revenue, these people want to literally destroy an asset valued at 1/4 to 1/3 of a million dollars. All to get out of paying $30,000 to repair the roof!!!

I caught flak from some posters here when I stated I lived in a community plagued by uneducated morons. I wasn't exaggerating in the least.

Yeah... And who the hell is this Robert guy?!

I think I found my tagline...

Sounds like Congress.

NancyG3 (North Carolina)
Posts: 342

Posted:

At our annual meeting a discussion was going on about $10,000. dollars being paid to contractors out of a petty cash fund when the president of the boards wife piped up and said, "well you know how the good ole boys down here want to be paid in cash".

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By KevinK7 on 11/12/2013 1:02 AM

Sounds like Congress.

Tell it. At least some of the people in my neck of the woods have an excuse for their antics. Congress doesn't.

"It's easy to love folly in a child"

LarryB13 (Arizona)
Posts: 4,099

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By GnomeX on 11/11/2013 9:20 AM
Our Clubhouse is valued at around $250,000 - 300,000 even in its poor condition. The roof is leaking and needs to be completely re-shingled at a cost of around $30,000.

Clubhouse roof repairs were debated. One member piped up we should just "blow up the Clubhouse" to which he received a standing ovation from nearly everyone in the room. I'm NOT joking. Other more moderate views were to pay someone to demolish the Clubhouse.

So instead of working to sell an asset or leasing it to generate revenue, these people want to literally destroy an asset valued at 1/4 to 1/3 of a million dollars. All to get out of paying $30,000 to repair the roof!!!

Just what do they think it will cost to demolish the structure, haul away the debris, and restore the site?

Here's an idea: submit a plan to the members for demolition complete with cost estimates from a few professionals. I'll bet when they see those numbers that $30,000 roof repair will look a little more attractive.

BruceF1 (Connecticut)
Posts: 2,535

Posted:

Quote:

This is just a guess on my part, but it sounds to me like roof replacement wasn't considered in the reserve study, assuming there was one. Although, it is possible that the roof needs repair early. In any event, it sounds to me like there isn't enough money in reserves for the roof repairs and the board is trying to avoid a special assessment.

There are other alternatives:

Borrow from reserves and replace the funds over time by increasing the regular assessment.

Borrow the money from a bank and pay the loan off through an increase in monthly assessments. Of course, this assumes your board or the corporation is allowed to borrow (right to commit or assign future income).

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By LarryB13 on 11/13/2013 9:01 PM

Just what do they think it will cost to demolish the structure, haul away the debris, and restore the site?

Ahhh... the problem is you used the word "think"...

CarolR11 (Colorado)
Posts: 2,563

Posted:

After a few years of terrible boards, two of us got elected. A third on this Board of 7 joined with us sometimes. Badly outnumbered, the 2-3 of us figured we'd have to use procedure & protocol to get anything done since no reelected directors knew much of anything at all.

At the organizational meeting immediately following the election, another newly-elected director, who'd only owned in our HOA for a year and who lived here part-time (OK in our HOA) was elected president because he was on the side of the "bad guys."

Then we turned to parliamentary procedure and we three suggested Robert's Rules of Order. The new prez literally flew into a rage. "Why should we use him??!! He only wants to sell his books!!" Stunned, a bare majority did outvote him.

He was on the city council of a middlin' sized town an hour from here. A year later, he resigned from our Board because . . . wait for it . . . he was elected mayor!

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By BruceF1 on 11/14/2013 5:02 AM

This is just a guess on my part, but it sounds to me like roof replacement wasn't considered in the reserve study, assuming there was one. Although, it is possible that the roof needs repair early. In any event, it sounds to me like there isn't enough money in reserves for the roof repairs and the board is trying to avoid a special assessment.

Bruce I could see where a rational person would come to the conclusion that the body of our members are objecting to the roof replacement due to not having enough in reserves. IE "it sounds to me like there isn't enough money in reserves for the roof repairs and the board is trying to avoid a special assessment".

That isn't the case at all. No special assessment needed. We have over $180,000 in total reserves and have already spent $9,000 on the roof project as a down payment. So after the roof is repaired we will still have around $155,000 in reserves.

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By CarolR11 on 11/14/2013 10:49 AM

Then we turned to parliamentary procedure and we three suggested Robert's Rules of Order. The new prez literally flew into a rage. "Why should we use him??!! He only wants to sell his books!!" Stunned, a bare majority did outvote him.

He was on the city council of a middlin' sized town an hour from here. A year later, he resigned from our Board because . . . wait for it . . . he was elected mayor!

Oh geez. Hopefully the city attorney keeps people like him in check but sometimes not.

JoK2 (California)
Posts: 198

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By GnomeX on 11/11/2013 4:15 PM

No I've never been to Congress...

Now that's the ABSOLUTE FUNNIEST reply EVER Written! 100% correct too!

LauraR5 (Tennessee)
Posts: 220

Posted:

You've already paid a $10K downpayment and NOW they don't want to go through with it? I hope the board has better sense than that.

I literally had a homeowner blah blah blah about the cost of the landscapers for about 20 minutes, telling me she knows "tons of people who could do the work for less money." I told her our insurance requires us to use a company that is licensed and bonded and that the cost is actually well under budget this year. That shut her up for now, but I'm sure it'll be something else soon enough. I don't think they understand that even if they find us some miracle to save us money I'm not lowering their assessments. EVER. New roofs and streets are expensive.

JohnC46 (South Carolina)
Posts: 14,265

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By LauraR5 on 11/26/2013 12:37 PM
You've already paid a $10K downpayment and NOW they don't want to go through with it? I hope the board has better sense than that.

I literally had a homeowner blah blah blah about the cost of the landscapers for about 20 minutes, telling me she knows "tons of people who could do the work for less money." I told her our insurance requires us to use a company that is licensed and bonded and that the cost is actually well under budget this year. That shut her up for now, but I'm sure it'll be something else soon enough. I don't think they understand that even if they find us some miracle to save us money I'm not lowering their assessments. EVER. New roofs and streets are expensive.

Was that a Freudian slip? Meaning should the I be we or do you alone have the power to lower assesments?

Overall I believe assessments should rarely, if ever, lowered. Few if any have a large enough Reserve and that is where extra money should go or to improvements.

LauraR5 (Tennessee)
Posts: 220

Posted:

My neighbors have a tendency to latch on to one person and anoint them as the chief complaint intake specialist. Since I've been on the board (even before I was president) I somehow drew the short straw and became the anointed one. I know that I alone do not have the power to lower assessments, but realistically no one is going to do it, so it doesn't matter if they ask me, the entire board, all of their neighbors or the president of the United States. While we have a good chunk of money in reserves, we also have a sprinkler system that needs at least $30K in repairs and aging roofs. Not to mention that every time the wind blows, someone's siding comes off their home.

LauraR5 (Tennessee)
Posts: 220

Posted:

Oh, and at some point I suspect that the city will notice that none of our private streets have street lights and install them and send us a bill. So, needless to say, assessments will not be decreasing.

MelissaP1 (Alabama)
Posts: 13,836

Posted:

Our HOA did lower assessments once before I started. They lowered it from $75 to $50 a month. However, that was because we stopped supplying the water and put in separate water meters. That cost us $20K which caused a special assessment of $350 a piece. Plus we had to give our roads up to be PUBLIC and rewrite our rules for another almost $3K...

The added irony on this? The water bill on averages were between $30 to $50 a month per owner. It was cheaper most likely to have kept the water system the way it was. Plus we could force people to pay up their dues owed by cutting off their water. Which now we could no longer do....

I tell people in my HOA, that $50 is more than I pay just for lawncare in my non-HOA home. It costs me $40 every 2 weeks just to have my lawn mowed. Garbage pick up is an extra $15 a month. I don't have access to a pool or clubhouse. So to complain about the $50 a month that gives you garbage pickup, recycling, lawncare, a pool, clubhouse access, and sometime maintenance items/supplies... Is a pretty darn good bargain!!!

Former HOA President

RayC4 (Virginia)
Posts: 173

Posted:

Quote:

Posted By MelissaP1 on 11/26/2013 2:38 PM
Plus we could force people to pay up their dues owed by cutting off their water.

I believe that would be an illegal maneuver in our state.

I agree that despite all the HOA 'problems' enumerated on this forum, most of the time HOAs are well run and absolutely a financial bargain with respect to living expenses.

GnomeX (Washington)
Posts: 253

Posted:

Posted By LauraR5 on 11/26/2013 12:37 PM
You've already paid a $10K downpayment and NOW they don't want to go through with it? I hope the board has better sense than that.

Many don't want to go through with it. And some on the Board are severely lacking any sensibility. The Board President was against repairing the roof. The ghetto mentality is rampant here. They literally will cut off their nose to spite their face. They only look at short term costs. They literally want to destroy real property to avoid paying to maintain it.

But it gets even better.

At last month's Board meeting, one homeowner came in and threatened to sue the HOA for "breach of contract". He said the association is not maintaining the common areas. BTW he is the son-in-law of the original developer. The same developer that NEVER deeded over any of the common areas.

Then he went on to say we are wasting money by repairing the Clubhouse roof.

So on the one hand he wants sue the HOA for allegedly not maintaining the common areas then not two minutes later in the same meeting complain that we are wasting money by repairing one common area component, the Clubhouse roof.

This is the special kind of stupid I deal with all the time.

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