Dealing with an unbalanced owner

As I have mentioned in a few prior questions, I am a Board Member and Secretary of a self-managed Condo. The board was completely replaced in June so we are new and trying to correct a lot of issues. For those more experienced Board Members, I'm looking for advise on handling a problem owner. Sorry for the long post.....

Here's some background: The owner has a second floor condo. There are 4 units each building. Another board member lives in the same building. The owner is a very nice woman who is dealing with cancer. I believe there's something mentally going on but I'm not a doctor so I can't diagnose what it may be (mental illness, dementia, medication, etc?)

She's got all the windows, AC, fireplace,and patio door sealed from the inside. She's afraid of air and mice getting into unit. She calls the board member/neighor at all hours of the day to borrow water and ice because hers tastes funny. She puts rat poison in the halls. We've said she can't do this because it's a pet friendly building.

We have a maintenance person (he does condo and private work) that won't deal with her because she calls him 15-20 times a day. Her main complaint is the hot air getting into unit. Duh, it's a second floor unit sealed from top to bottom, it's going to be hot!

This week, we had a vendor working on a sump pump (not hers) and she interuppted them multiple times throughout the day to ask questions about the work. She was afraid a mouse was going to get into the pipe. She said her husband said the vendor's doing it wrong. He passed away over 15 years ago! There's more examples but you should get the idea. The other board member/neighbor says her family is aware but they don't do anything.

Does anyone have any advise? She costs us money when she's interupping vendors and they stop and talk to her.
Do we start documenting and sending letters to her and her family? Would her actions fall under nuisance bylaws? Is it time to get legal advise? Call Health and Human Services? I'm a compassionate person but we're a condo not an assisted living facility!

Help??

Thanks,
Cathleen

I agree with SheliaH. This might be dementia. It might be paranoia. It is not your place to determine it. The family may not be able to handle it. Call adult protective services. I would do this over church/synagogue because of the legal implications. Get the phone records. Calling for water? Taping up everything?

ValerieS2, do you have a suggestion instead of a snippy comment?

Luckily, I'm not one of the members she calls. Taking Board Member and Officer out of equation, if she was calling me 15-20 times per day (doesn't matter what for), I'd tell her to quit calling, or I'll be filing harrassment charges. If I lived by her, I'd call the Fire Department concerned that covering all the vents, with foam and ducktape, could cause a fire and burn our place down. If I was paying for a vendor and her interrptions caused me to pay more, I'd tell the vendor to charge her the extra time.

As Board Members, are we held to a higher standard?

Thank you everyone else for your responses!

JM10 - You're right, it was a poor response on my part. I reacted poorly to ValerieS2's unhelpful comment. The intent of my original post was that we are aware something is going on, want to look past the numerous nusiances, and help. But we're not sure if we, collectively as a board, can/should be doing anything or one of us just needs to call professionals.

Again, I do appreciate everyone's responses. An inquiry with APS is probably what we'll do.

Sadly, this is another issue that HOAs will be seeing more of in the future. As the nation gets older and we seem to be more and more isolated from each other (with and without assorted family drama), there are a number of older people living alone and when they face problems, some have no one to turn to. In a high rise condo (and townhomes, for that matter), these folks may end up with a hoarding problem that can result in pest infestation and a fire hazard.

In my community one of our former Board members became a hoarder and one day, she fell and some of the junk wound up on top of her. She stayed like that for 3 days and the only reason she was found was because we had workers installing our new gutters. I learned what happened when I ran into one of her relatives at the trash dumpster - she was trying to clean the place up, but unfortunately she was trying to get rid of heavy trash which the city doesn't allow in dumpsters.

The neighbor went to a rehab center for a while, came home and tried to make another go of living alone, but it didn't work and now she's in a nursing home - we don't know if it's permanent. There are various articles around the web on "aging in place" and I know CAI's magazine has had a few articles on its implications for homeowner associations.

Not to get in anyone's business, but it may be helpful if your board starts talking about the topic a little bit to brainstorm on how you can deal with similar situations in the future - perhaps starting with identifying some of the older folks in the community and keeping an eye on them.

According to her neighbor and a current Board Member, her family is aware.

I do understand the delicacies of this situation. Two years ago when living in my apt, I had to call the police on a neighbor. He was a friendly young man. It was fun to watch him play catch with his kids in our courtyard when he had visitation. He was neighborly and helped me jump my car when it wouldn't start.

However, if he wasn't taking his schizophrenia medication he exhibited bizarre behavior. After losing his job (which was the most like reason for not taking his meds) he lost custody of his kids. When lucid and we'd run into each other, he talked about his job and kids. He also mentioned having a case worker so I knew he was working with professionals.

Most of his behaviour was weird and annoying but harmless. My personal safety was heightened when he put a dish of cat food on my window sill. Very nice thing to do for my cat that sat in the window, a tad creepy that he was at my bedroom window!

Rumor around the complex a few days prior was that he'd had a run in with police for bizarre public behavior so I was aware he was struggling and his illness was not under control. I called the police one morning because he was pacing in front of my garage door (it was next to his), "talking" to someone and punching at the sky.

The police said they were familar with his deteriorating situation. I will never forget the police telling me that sometimes they wish they could do more but "it's not illegal to be mentally ill" and he need to be a threat to himself or others for them to take him. The officer told me he was rapping and singing when they approached him. It sounds innocent after, but how was I supposed to know that? I wasn't going to walk up to him and find out he thinks he's arguing with someone.

I'm not sure what transpired next (he either did or said something) because the other officer called his partner over, they put him in cuffs. He was gone at least 2 weeks because I had moved out. To this day, I wonder about him.

I will stop looking at this issue from a Board Member perspective and will suggest her neighbor/Board Member try and speak with the family again, and then if necessary, we will contact professionals.

I know I keep saying this, but thank you for the responses. It gave me the opportunity think it though...

Cathleen I am still trying to figure out what she did that was so out of line that you feel intervention is needed. From what you have posted, she is a quirky and lonely old lady who annoys you.

Hardly a cause for involving FPS.

I only gave a snippet of her behavior and actions but here in lies the problem. To those who live near her or the Board Members she excessively calls, her quirky behavior is either boardering on OCD (or some other illness) or harrassment. There really isn't a middle ground....

I am not personally dealing with her and only know how it affects my fellow Board Members. As a new Board, this forum is extremely helpful and I'm sure will post another question soon. However, I'd like to consider this post closed.

Thank you

You are, of course, entitled to consider it anything you like.

Please keep in mind the ramifications of the choices you have; this is an elderly woman with cancer who is clearly dealing with some mental health issues, she is not a criminal although if a dog is poisoned from the rat poison, it would be a terrible thing. I would send a certified letter to the family, describing her behavior and stating that her behavior is getting progressively worse and that the fear is that she will hurt herself or others. I would also ask them to call to discuss the matter, but if they do not call, you will be forced to deal with the situation on your own which could include calling protective services or the police, the end result of which may be that she is placed in a facility equipped to handle her problems and her condo may be taken to pay for the services. Then if you do not get a response, I would call protective services; they are usually a quasi-law enforcement agency, at least on the front lines, and from there, they could coordinate services for her to include a mental health evaluation and possibly get her a home health aide among other things. The reason I would send the letter first is to have proof that you tried to contact the family to protect yourselves, so if for some reason she loses her condo or hurts herself or kills a dog, they cant blame you. Trying to reason with this woman is not going to work, but please have compassion for her.

I agree! Not wanting to upset Grandma for fear of being cutting out of the will - or they can’t decide who should pursue guardianship or a power of attorney may be driving the family’s inaction. There may also be a money issue – you need an attorney to prepare the power of attorney paperwork (and still have to talk to the lady about who she’d like to give it to, which will likely upset assorted family members). If she needs a guardian, an attorney is necessary to go to court, get a doctor to testify as to the woman’s competency and then figure out who’s actually going to be the guardian. It can get very messy very quickly, especially when the money issues arise: how much does she have where the bank accounts are, is there enough money to pay for assisted living or a nursing home if it comes to that….

I've had board members who interrupted vendors so often, they felt compelled to inquire if they could charge more due to their lost time. Their request, sadly, was legitimate. We (board) told the vendors to ignore....literally ignore people who disrupt them if those people have that reputation on a job site.

Posted By LarryB13:

When we had to put my mother into a nursing home we wasted a lot time with attorneys and adult protective services.

The real-world process was far less complicated. We found a nursing home that could care for persons with dementia. We took my mother there, the staff doctor performed an evaluation and concluded that my mother was suffering from dementia, and the nursing home admitted her as a patient. It really is that simple and I found out it happens just that way all the time.